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Hi from Cécile!

Let me ask you this: Are you creating boundaries or walls? There's a fine line between being liked and respected as a leader.

Let's take the following phrase, for example.

"Stop right there!"

It's a phrase we've all used at some point.

Those three words can carry immense power - when used correctly.

Stop = swift action required
Right = precision in timing
There = creating a boundary

Is it healthy, though? Where's the boundary between authority and authoritarianism?

Liked vs. Respected

When I coach new leaders (who recently got promoted to leadership positions), I identify a recurring pattern: they struggle with confrontation and let minor issues slide until they become big problems.

Does that sound familiar?

The key point is understanding that it's about something other than being liked. It's about being respected.

As a leader, you may have to make tough decisions or handle tough conversations. These are usually not things everyone feels comfortable or happy with.

On the other hand, setting clear boundaries (for yourself or your team members) and taking immediate action when unacceptable behaviours occur is a sign of strong leadership that builds respect.

If you find yourself saying the phrase above, do this ⤵️

Your 3x checklist

• Always follow up with a specific explanation of why what was said or done was unacceptable and what the consequences are or can be.
• Your tone of voice matters (perhaps more than words). Firm does not mean aggressive. Clear does not mean cold. Authoritative does not mean authoritarian.
• Remember that timing is crucial in such cases. If something unacceptable happens once, it will happen again, creating new unhealthy habits and norms over time. Addressing the issues when you first spot them is the best way forward.

Demanded vs. Earned

In addition to the above, here's another crucial question: Do you demand focus as a leader or earn it?

One of the leaders’ most critical responsibilities is effective communication.

Attention is an effort, and it's limited. What does it mean if you ask for it?

In an ideal world, People should be inclined to give 100% of their energy during meetings, presentations, negotiations, or any other business occasion where communication is critical. The reality is far from it.

Let me unpack a common phrase we have all likely used at some point.

“I need your attention!”. Discover more here.

That's me in the cold water!

Confidence when giving a presentation and cold water immersion share several parallels that can help us understand how to develop resilience and manage discomfort.

Click on the image below to discover more.

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